I can't promise this is going to be a funny post (unless you think fat people are funny)

You know what happens if you are lazy and eat whatever you want for a couple of years? Yeah, you get fat. Who knew, right? Someone should really tell people that.

The last few months of 2009 were the last time I was regularly in the gym. And I was doing great. I don't know what happened. It only takes a couple days of skipping the gym to get back into full sloth mode -- at least for me. I certainly wasn't thin back then, but I was working toward the goal of weighing less than a newborn elephant.

I was thin as a kid. I played outside and ran around and rode my bike all over the neighborhood. When I got into high school I was on the drill team for four years (insert embarrassing picture here). I wasn't fat but I was bigger than a lot of the girls I danced with. I certainly had a larger waist and "personality" than most of them. , I'm shaped more like an apple and carry weight mostly in my stomach and chest. Of course, when you weigh this much, it's pretty much everywhere.

The last time I weighed less than 200 pounds was probably 2008. I was going to the gym regularly and counting calories. I certainly wasn't skinny but I looked good. It makes me want to cry a little to see this picture now. Look how skinny my arm was! And that shirt wasn't from the plus size section. Ack!

Aggie Football game 2008

But I regressed into laziness and fatness once again. There aren't any excuses for this. Just me being lazy and liking to eat delicious food. This picture is from February. I think I see three chins. I don't have a wider shot to show you because like most people that get out of breath getting dressed in the morning, I avoid photos. You can certainly see the extra 50 pounds in my face though.

Feb 26, 2011 - BBQ Cookoff

Anyway, the point of this post wasn't to wallow in self pity but to talk about how I'm going to change it. Last week I unwrapped a Jillian Michaels DVD that someone gave me in December. Of 2009. Yeah, lazy.

Still in the plastic wrap

So, I'm working out. It's been a week and I've worked out three times. Definitely not as much as I should have, but I'm doing it. I know it'll help with lots of things, not just weight. I am sleeping terribly and grumpy and a little depressed. I think I might get a yoga DVD to do every other day. Jillian knows about getting in shape but she's a little too advanced for me right now. Plus I'd like to be able to touch my toes again.

It's kind of funny now to look back at what I thought was fat when I was in college. I had no idea. Dumb college kids!

I might be the most boring person on Earth

I sometimes have really good ideas for blog posts but they usually occur while I'm driving or about to fall asleep so then when I do sit down and think "I should blog" I have nothing to share.  This is another one of those times.

I spent the day in bed with a migraine. I haven't had one this bad in a long time. It still hurts but a lot less and I had to get out of the bed or there was no way I'd be able to sleep tonight. I haven't been to the doctor in months so I have no Imitrex to take. I self medicated with Alleve at 8 this morning. And then took some more and drank some coffee around 3:30. I should probably eat something as well but the sleeping cat in my lap doesn't look like he wants to be disturbed.

Holy crap daytime TV sucks. I am actually looking forward to the local news at 5.

Speaking of news, Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords was moved to Houston last week and there have been 10 news trucks lined up on the street where my parking garage is at work. I've been keeping an eye out for Bill Weir so I can stalk him, but no suck luck. I haven't seen anyone famous but I'll keep looking.

Yeah, I guess that about sums up everything that is going on. I really am boring. I'm still working crazy hours but I think the end is in sight. The deadline for applicants to apply is February 1. I'll probably work some this weekend since I was out today but then it should be almost back to normal.

When I'm not at work, I'm pretty much reading my Kindle that I got for my birthday. It's nonstop fun around here :)

I need a witty title to go here but, eh, fuck it, I'm too lazy

I've actually spent the last three plus months working more than 40 hours a week so maybe it's not so much laziness as being preoccupied. Work was overwhelming. I don't know how people can be workaholics. I did what had to be done but I wanted it to END! It's almost back normal, I think. Anyway, I certainly had time to type up a funny story or an eloquent musing. Of course, I'm not sure I have ever had/typed an eloquent musing but that's not really the point.

It's 2011 and it's been more than two months since I've graced all three of you Lazy Blog readers with my insightful thoughts on life and laziness. I'm hoping this year bring some good things for me. For the past five years or so, I haven't had anything to say when people ask what is new with me. Nothing is new. I have the same job, the same car, the same single status, the same two cats. The only thing that's been new is the pounds I put on but that's not a very exciting update, especially since they can see that with their own eyes. I guess I need to counteract that by losing a couple pounds or 100. I'm not sure why I've gotten so complacent about my weight but I know I need to do something about it. However, I don't really feel like talking about it right now so on to other things.

Ack! I just realized I need to update my Blogger profile. I am no longer 31. (This post is very stream of consciousness, maybe more so than my normal postings.)

I don't make new years resolutions because I suck at sticking with things but I do have a few ideas of things I want to change. I want to spend more time with the people that are important to me. I haven't seen some of my good friends in months and they are less than 50 miles from me. That is ridiculous.

I also want to stop spending so much money on food, especially buying lunch during the week. That will help save money and cut back on calories. I have made it two days and stuck with it. Only 363 more to go! I actually set a goal of bringing my lunch four days a week. I think that is a reasonable goal and still allows some flexibility when that Chick-fil-A craving hits.

And like always, I want to spend more time writing on this blog or maybe writing some short stories or fictional stuff. I read 73 books last year so I obviously have some free time. I think of some very funny and interesting things to share when I'm laying awake at night unable to fall asleep. I need to put those to good use. (I often have trouble with lay/lie but I'm too lazy to look it up right. I very rarely edit my blog posts. I just type and hit submit which considering other people's grammar mistakes bother me, is kind of dumb but whatever.)

I really think 2011 is going to be a good year. If not, I'll probably read 80 books this time around.

I had a wonderful, relaxing, LAZY weekend

First of all, I changed the background of my blog when I posted last time. And it's been so long ago that I forget I'd done it. Awesome.


I figured out what I want to be when I grow up. I want to be rich. So I can wake up this view every morning.

I normally like to think of myself as a city girl but that could change my mind. I spent the weekend in Onalaska (population  1,174 ) with some girlfriends. One of the girls parent's own a lake house on Lake Livingston. It was so pretty and peaceful. We drank and talked and danced and watched a little sports. Mostly we just sat outside and enjoyed the beautiful surroundings and weather.


I took my Nikon camera but never got it out of the suitcase. So, these pics are all from my blackberry.

They had these awesome hammock-like swings on the boat dock.  They didn't know I was aking the picture but you can only see outlines anyway.

And just in case you don't believe I was there, here's a self portrait from Saturday afternoon. It was crazy windy.

It's not often you get to use the phrase "overall jorts"

Not much going on in the world of lazy.

I'm working a lot more since my coworker retired on August 31. The position finally got posted this week so hopefully soon I'll have some help. Right now the workload is manageable but very quickly it's going to get out of control. After her retirement, I'm the person in my department with the most seniority. That's weird. Of course, the fact that I'm an adult is still weird to me!

I quit my second job (again). I do love working with Kasey and of course the money, but between the extra hours at work and all the fun stuff I want to do on the weekend, I decided it was time to quit.

Football season is upon us and so far my teams are 3-0 (Aggies) and 2-0 (Texans). It's kind of a nice change to have winning records even if it's so early in the season and both of last week's games almost gave me a heart attack.

My friend Eilene and I went to College Station for the Aggie game. We did some tailgating. Oh my god, that reminds me ...

Two guys, two pairs overall jorts, one rolling cooler

I love these two guys. They were both sporting cutoff overall jorts that had been painted with various Aggie-themed sayings like "gig 'em" and "redass" and they wore them with pride. They were shirtless, boot-wearing, overall jort loving guys. They waved as they walked by with their cooler.

Sunday I watched football all day. The Texans beat the Redskins in a crazy come from behind overtime game. I was yelling at my TV a lot that day.

but it certainly helps 

Well, hello, my old blog

I have been spending my time reading books and watching Criminal Minds reruns. Oh, the life of a single gal...

I think I'm going to change my blog name. Of course, that will depend on me actually blogging! I've neglected it so long, I couldn't remember the exact URL. So sad!

Someone with more motivation than me needs to invent a motivation pill

I have zero motivation. I don't want to do any work. I'm here. I've got all of the programs open that I need. I have coffee and diet coke available.

But I just can't get motivated. I don't know what's wrong. I know that no one else is going to do the work. And the more I put it off, the more stressed it'll make me to do it. But I've got Target.com open, blogger open and I've played Bejeweled Blitz for about 30 minutes today.

I even tried to give myself a stern talking to but I got about 3 words in and decided I didn't have the motivation for that either.

I'm going to have to work over the weekend if I don't get busy. There is a scene in Boogie Nights where Philip Seymour Hoffman keeps hitting himself in the head and saying "stupid, stupid, stupid".

That's me right now.

Oh Look!

I'm the worst blogger ever!

I have been keeping busy though so as soon as I feel like typing, I actually have some stories to share.

Maybe this weekend. It's finally going to feel like fall this weekend. Sounds like a good reason to make some Butter-Nut instant hot chocolate and type up some stories for all of my adoring fans (stop laughing!)